On Shopping Addiction - Part II
The Impact
The impact of compulsive shopping is huge, because it can damage a person’s life seriously. First, the debts are accumulated in the process of one shopping spree after another. There are people who apply new credits because they cannot wait until their credit card companies increase their credit limits. Also, there are people who get more credit cards in order to pay off old debts, but this does not really work; it simply results in more and more debts. Although some compulsive shoppers find ways to increase their income by working on more than one job, their focus and energy levels will gradually decrease due to long working hours and insufficient rest, and their health slowly deteriorates in the name of financial improvement. Moreover, they might not actually improve their financial status, because once they earn more, they will spend more. Eventually, they always lack money.
Next, shopping addiction damages a person’s relationships, especially family relationships. Compulsive shoppers take time away from family to linger in the mall, or work on another job to increase their power of buying. The more frequent they are away from home, the more alienation they create between their family and themselves. When they come home with lots of merchandises, they may have to sneak into their home so their family members would not see how many items they have purchased, and when they are questioned about spending or credit card debts by their spouse, arguments or fights usually follow. As mentioned previously, such pattern of familial interaction can easily result in divorce.
An adult’s addictive shopping also brings negative influences on their children, too. Children would wonder why their mother or father cares far more about what’s in store than how their day was in the school, and they may consider that their mother or father does not love them anymore. On the other end, the adult shopoholic carries tremendous guilt toward the children because she or he does not spend enough time with them, but it is difficult enough for the shopper to face her or his spouse, let alone the children. As time goes by, children gradually lose their trust for the shopoholic parent, and the parent-child relationship will definitely deteriorate in times to come.
Challenges for Counselors
The primary challenge for counselors who counsel shopoholics is finding out what is behind the compulsive shopping, because the real problem is frequently not shopping itself. Although “spending is usually the main symptom, and this, triggered by emotion, the cause goes much deeper” (Williams, n.d.). If the client shops excessively because of depression or anxiety, the counselor should discover what causes the client’s depression or anxiety. If the compulsive shopper is under a tremendous amount of stress that triggers her or him to spend too much, the counselor has to find out the source(s) of such pressure. Or, if the client goes shopping to raise her or his self-esteem, the counselor needs to dig deep and discover why the client does not value her- or himself highly.
Next, people who shop compulsively may be reluctant or resistant to admit or seek professional assistance. Since most people believe that the problem is about income, they are likely to have the tendency to consider that they simply do not make enough money to buy, and will probably work harder toward more income. “They misidentify the cause as something outside of themselves; their job, boss, spouse, taxes, the creditors, prices, etc. This form of denial effectively blocks any kind of solution, locking us into an ever deepening problem” (Williams, n.d.).
Although shopolohics may not be willing to seek counseling to help themselves deal with their overspending, once they really go on therapy, it is possible for some of them to depend on the counselor or therapist to solve all their problems, especially for those who have low self-esteem – they are not use to the idea that everyone has the ability to realize what is best for her or him and do it. For such clients, the counselor would have to teach them ways of re-establishing self-esteem, and gradually help them not to build their self-esteem on how much money they can spend.
Intervention and Strategies
When it comes to addictions, no matter the issue is Internet addiction, alcoholism, unnecessary eBay purchasing, or compulsive gambling, it’s all about patterns of behavior (Hart, 2002). Therefore, the treatment should be focused on modifying the client’s thoughts and behaviors in order for them to gradually stop overspending. The followings are intervention and strategies for helping people who have shopping addiction:
A. Activity monitoring and scheduling: it is not uncommon for compulsive shoppers to abandon their originally scheduled activities and go for shopping. Therefore, it is essential for them to monitor and schedule their daily activities. For instance, counselors can find out what their clients’ daily activities and their interests and/or hobbies are, and use an activity schedule to help client make plans on what to do in a certain time of the day, a certain day of the week on their own. In additions, have clients make an activity schedule by themselves gives them as sense of accomplishment, and when they come home and really stick to their schedule, they will gain a sense of confidence because they regain their ability of self-control.
B. Journaling: keep a personal shopping diary (Benson, 2003) is also important for compulsive shoppers if they want to modify their behavior. Counselors can encourage their clients to write down what they have bought after each shopping trip, and ask them to examine from their journal which items are truly necessities and which are not. The purpose of journal keeping is to assist clients on organizing and processing their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. In additions, the journal also helps counselors identify the pattern of their clients’ compulsive shopping and types of merchandises that attract their clients over and over again, so both parties can obtain a more in-depth understanding of such problematic behavior.
C. Exercise routine: counselors should attempt to find out what kind(s) of physical activities their clients like or are used to practice regularly before they become addicted in shopping, and help them re-establish their exercise routine little by little. If the client likes to jog, the counselor can encourage her or him to start a daily ten-minute jog in locations near the home, within the community, and away from stores or the mall, and gradually increase the duration of jogging. Or, if the client used to go to the gym, encourage her or him to return there and whenever the urge of shopping emerges, she or he can go to the gym instead of the mall, and thus gradually pull the client away from habitual shopping.
D. Self-help or support group: group therapy provides an opportunity for small groups of people to meet and share general concerns, explore personal issues, and learn new skills to deal with different issues and conditions guided by the leader(s) of the group. Group participants help each other by offering feedback and suggestions and giving feedback. The advantages of a counseling, therapeutic, or support group, actual or virtual, are economy and efficiency, various perspectives and resources, common experience, a sense of belonging, practice of skills, feedback, alternative options, approximation to the real life, contract and promise (Jacob, Masson, & Harvill, 2002), so compulsive shoppers can listen, share, support, encourage, and pray for one another in a self-help or support group.
E. Spiritual enrichment: Many so-called solutions actually hide the blemishes but have nothing to offer for healing compulsive shoppers. Next, many financial organizations have plans to intervene and improve the shoppers’ financial situation, but they still do not solve the problem, because after the solutions are gone, compulsive shoppers will still encounter the addict when they look into the mirror. Instead of choosing options that do not solve but mask the issue, compulsive shoppers need the kind of help that eliminates their vicious spending cycle, the kind of help that gives them miraculous power to overcome the incompleteness or emptiness at the root of their problem. Only God can offer this help. Just like drug abuse, alcoholism, or any other severe addictions, people often cannot solve it by themselves alone. They will be empowered to solve the symptoms and problems that the void causes when God fills the void within them (Williams, n.d.).
Once the counselor and the client have identified the problem accurately, it is possible that they still run a huge risk of seeking the wrong solution (Williams, n.d.), so counselors should be careful not to provide resources or suggestions that might lead their clients into another financial trap. If such compulsiveness is truly serious, medication might be taken into account along with professional counseling. Some reports indicate that the majority of people who take medication for curing shopping addiction “rated themselves ‘very much improved’ or ‘much improved’ and reported a loss of interest in shopping” (Parker, 2003).
Conclusion
Shopping addictions are said to be a result of the interplay among psychological, biological, and social factors. Finding out the root of overspending is challenging enough for counselors and therapists, and they should help their clients regain self-control through intervention and strategies that distinguish emotional filters, challenge dysfunctional thoughts, examine their expenditures, and create a realistic spending plan, as well as negotiate lapses and prevent relapse (Benson, 2003). Furthermore, if we feel ourselves or people around us have spent too much, we can do or suggest the followings:
A. Only carry a small amount of cash
B. No checkbook / credit card
C. Get rid of excessive credit cards
D. Make a shopping list before shopping
E. Avoid discount warehouses
F. Avoid mail, TV, or online order
G. Take a walk in nature or start exercising when the urge of shopping emerges
H. Seek professional help if spending is out of control
Finally, let us not forget the power of God, and help those who shop excessively realize that their value is not measured by how much they can spend or what they can afford, but determined by their relationship with God.
References
Benson Dr., A. L. (2000). I shop, therefore I am – Compulsive buying and the search for self (Ed.). Lenham, Maryland: Jason Aronson Inc.
Benson Dr., A. L. (2003). Stopping Overtopping Groups flyer. In Stopping Overtopping. Retrieved July 27, 2005 from http://www.stoppingovershopping.com/Flyer.pdf
Bhat, U. (September 8, 2004). Shopping, the new addiction. In Get Ahead. Retrieved June 30, 2005, from http://inhome.rediff.com/getahead/2004/sep/08ga-shop.htm
Chang, L. W. (January 24, 2005). Shop to buy happiness. China Times, p. D2.
Chao, S. C. (June 15, 2005). Women promoting the trend of online retail. In FIND - Focus on Internet News and Data. Retrieved June 30, 2005 from http://www.find.org.tw/0105/news/0105_news_disp.asp?news_id=3748
Engs, R. C. (2005). How can I manage compulsive shopping and spending (Shopoholism). In Alcohol Research and Health Information. Retrieved June 30, 2005 from http://www.indiana.edu/~engs/hints/shop.html
Hart, P. (2002). Be it gambling, drinking, shopping: Addiction is a matter of behavior, prof says. In University Time,University of Pittsburgh, Vol. 34, No. 22. Retrieved July 25, 2005 from http://www.pitt.edu/utimes/issues/34/020711/07.html
Hatfield, H. (2004, November 23). Shopping spree, or addiction? In WebMD Health [On-Line serial]. Retrieved June 30, 2005 from http://my.webmd.com/content/Article/97/104241.htm?pagenumber=1
Hinkley, P. (2005). Stress cycle. Lecture notes.Jacobs, E. E., Masson, R. L., & Harvill, R. L. (2002). Group counseling: Strategies & skills (4th ed.). Pacific Grove, CA: Brooks/Cole.
Parker, R. (2003). Stanford researchers discover treatment for obsessive shopping disorder. In FuturePundit. Retrieved July 27, 2005 from http://www.futurepundit.com/archives/001490.html
Psychology Today. (1995). The call of the mall. In Yahoo Health. Retrieved July 15, 2005 from http://health.yahoo.com/health/centers/addiction/1361.html
Type of addiction – Shopping (n.d.). Retrieved July 27, 2005 from http://www.theway.uk.com/addoctopms/types/typesshop.htmAvl
What is shopping addiction and how can it be treated? (n.d.). Retrieved July 15, 2005 from http://www.coursework.info/i/263.html
Williams, G. (n.d.). Compulsive shopping addiction. In Way2Hope. Retrieved July 15, 2005 from http://www.way2hope.org/compulsive_shopping_addiction.htm
The impact of compulsive shopping is huge, because it can damage a person’s life seriously. First, the debts are accumulated in the process of one shopping spree after another. There are people who apply new credits because they cannot wait until their credit card companies increase their credit limits. Also, there are people who get more credit cards in order to pay off old debts, but this does not really work; it simply results in more and more debts. Although some compulsive shoppers find ways to increase their income by working on more than one job, their focus and energy levels will gradually decrease due to long working hours and insufficient rest, and their health slowly deteriorates in the name of financial improvement. Moreover, they might not actually improve their financial status, because once they earn more, they will spend more. Eventually, they always lack money.
Next, shopping addiction damages a person’s relationships, especially family relationships. Compulsive shoppers take time away from family to linger in the mall, or work on another job to increase their power of buying. The more frequent they are away from home, the more alienation they create between their family and themselves. When they come home with lots of merchandises, they may have to sneak into their home so their family members would not see how many items they have purchased, and when they are questioned about spending or credit card debts by their spouse, arguments or fights usually follow. As mentioned previously, such pattern of familial interaction can easily result in divorce.
An adult’s addictive shopping also brings negative influences on their children, too. Children would wonder why their mother or father cares far more about what’s in store than how their day was in the school, and they may consider that their mother or father does not love them anymore. On the other end, the adult shopoholic carries tremendous guilt toward the children because she or he does not spend enough time with them, but it is difficult enough for the shopper to face her or his spouse, let alone the children. As time goes by, children gradually lose their trust for the shopoholic parent, and the parent-child relationship will definitely deteriorate in times to come.
Challenges for Counselors
The primary challenge for counselors who counsel shopoholics is finding out what is behind the compulsive shopping, because the real problem is frequently not shopping itself. Although “spending is usually the main symptom, and this, triggered by emotion, the cause goes much deeper” (Williams, n.d.). If the client shops excessively because of depression or anxiety, the counselor should discover what causes the client’s depression or anxiety. If the compulsive shopper is under a tremendous amount of stress that triggers her or him to spend too much, the counselor has to find out the source(s) of such pressure. Or, if the client goes shopping to raise her or his self-esteem, the counselor needs to dig deep and discover why the client does not value her- or himself highly.
Next, people who shop compulsively may be reluctant or resistant to admit or seek professional assistance. Since most people believe that the problem is about income, they are likely to have the tendency to consider that they simply do not make enough money to buy, and will probably work harder toward more income. “They misidentify the cause as something outside of themselves; their job, boss, spouse, taxes, the creditors, prices, etc. This form of denial effectively blocks any kind of solution, locking us into an ever deepening problem” (Williams, n.d.).
Although shopolohics may not be willing to seek counseling to help themselves deal with their overspending, once they really go on therapy, it is possible for some of them to depend on the counselor or therapist to solve all their problems, especially for those who have low self-esteem – they are not use to the idea that everyone has the ability to realize what is best for her or him and do it. For such clients, the counselor would have to teach them ways of re-establishing self-esteem, and gradually help them not to build their self-esteem on how much money they can spend.
Intervention and Strategies
When it comes to addictions, no matter the issue is Internet addiction, alcoholism, unnecessary eBay purchasing, or compulsive gambling, it’s all about patterns of behavior (Hart, 2002). Therefore, the treatment should be focused on modifying the client’s thoughts and behaviors in order for them to gradually stop overspending. The followings are intervention and strategies for helping people who have shopping addiction:
A. Activity monitoring and scheduling: it is not uncommon for compulsive shoppers to abandon their originally scheduled activities and go for shopping. Therefore, it is essential for them to monitor and schedule their daily activities. For instance, counselors can find out what their clients’ daily activities and their interests and/or hobbies are, and use an activity schedule to help client make plans on what to do in a certain time of the day, a certain day of the week on their own. In additions, have clients make an activity schedule by themselves gives them as sense of accomplishment, and when they come home and really stick to their schedule, they will gain a sense of confidence because they regain their ability of self-control.
B. Journaling: keep a personal shopping diary (Benson, 2003) is also important for compulsive shoppers if they want to modify their behavior. Counselors can encourage their clients to write down what they have bought after each shopping trip, and ask them to examine from their journal which items are truly necessities and which are not. The purpose of journal keeping is to assist clients on organizing and processing their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. In additions, the journal also helps counselors identify the pattern of their clients’ compulsive shopping and types of merchandises that attract their clients over and over again, so both parties can obtain a more in-depth understanding of such problematic behavior.
C. Exercise routine: counselors should attempt to find out what kind(s) of physical activities their clients like or are used to practice regularly before they become addicted in shopping, and help them re-establish their exercise routine little by little. If the client likes to jog, the counselor can encourage her or him to start a daily ten-minute jog in locations near the home, within the community, and away from stores or the mall, and gradually increase the duration of jogging. Or, if the client used to go to the gym, encourage her or him to return there and whenever the urge of shopping emerges, she or he can go to the gym instead of the mall, and thus gradually pull the client away from habitual shopping.
D. Self-help or support group: group therapy provides an opportunity for small groups of people to meet and share general concerns, explore personal issues, and learn new skills to deal with different issues and conditions guided by the leader(s) of the group. Group participants help each other by offering feedback and suggestions and giving feedback. The advantages of a counseling, therapeutic, or support group, actual or virtual, are economy and efficiency, various perspectives and resources, common experience, a sense of belonging, practice of skills, feedback, alternative options, approximation to the real life, contract and promise (Jacob, Masson, & Harvill, 2002), so compulsive shoppers can listen, share, support, encourage, and pray for one another in a self-help or support group.
E. Spiritual enrichment: Many so-called solutions actually hide the blemishes but have nothing to offer for healing compulsive shoppers. Next, many financial organizations have plans to intervene and improve the shoppers’ financial situation, but they still do not solve the problem, because after the solutions are gone, compulsive shoppers will still encounter the addict when they look into the mirror. Instead of choosing options that do not solve but mask the issue, compulsive shoppers need the kind of help that eliminates their vicious spending cycle, the kind of help that gives them miraculous power to overcome the incompleteness or emptiness at the root of their problem. Only God can offer this help. Just like drug abuse, alcoholism, or any other severe addictions, people often cannot solve it by themselves alone. They will be empowered to solve the symptoms and problems that the void causes when God fills the void within them (Williams, n.d.).
Once the counselor and the client have identified the problem accurately, it is possible that they still run a huge risk of seeking the wrong solution (Williams, n.d.), so counselors should be careful not to provide resources or suggestions that might lead their clients into another financial trap. If such compulsiveness is truly serious, medication might be taken into account along with professional counseling. Some reports indicate that the majority of people who take medication for curing shopping addiction “rated themselves ‘very much improved’ or ‘much improved’ and reported a loss of interest in shopping” (Parker, 2003).
Conclusion
Shopping addictions are said to be a result of the interplay among psychological, biological, and social factors. Finding out the root of overspending is challenging enough for counselors and therapists, and they should help their clients regain self-control through intervention and strategies that distinguish emotional filters, challenge dysfunctional thoughts, examine their expenditures, and create a realistic spending plan, as well as negotiate lapses and prevent relapse (Benson, 2003). Furthermore, if we feel ourselves or people around us have spent too much, we can do or suggest the followings:
A. Only carry a small amount of cash
B. No checkbook / credit card
C. Get rid of excessive credit cards
D. Make a shopping list before shopping
E. Avoid discount warehouses
F. Avoid mail, TV, or online order
G. Take a walk in nature or start exercising when the urge of shopping emerges
H. Seek professional help if spending is out of control
Finally, let us not forget the power of God, and help those who shop excessively realize that their value is not measured by how much they can spend or what they can afford, but determined by their relationship with God.
References
Benson Dr., A. L. (2000). I shop, therefore I am – Compulsive buying and the search for self (Ed.). Lenham, Maryland: Jason Aronson Inc.
Benson Dr., A. L. (2003). Stopping Overtopping Groups flyer. In Stopping Overtopping. Retrieved July 27, 2005 from http://www.stoppingovershopping.com/Flyer.pdf
Bhat, U. (September 8, 2004). Shopping, the new addiction. In Get Ahead. Retrieved June 30, 2005, from http://inhome.rediff.com/getahead/2004/sep/08ga-shop.htm
Chang, L. W. (January 24, 2005). Shop to buy happiness. China Times, p. D2.
Chao, S. C. (June 15, 2005). Women promoting the trend of online retail. In FIND - Focus on Internet News and Data. Retrieved June 30, 2005 from http://www.find.org.tw/0105/news/0105_news_disp.asp?news_id=3748
Engs, R. C. (2005). How can I manage compulsive shopping and spending (Shopoholism). In Alcohol Research and Health Information. Retrieved June 30, 2005 from http://www.indiana.edu/~engs/hints/shop.html
Hart, P. (2002). Be it gambling, drinking, shopping: Addiction is a matter of behavior, prof says. In University Time,University of Pittsburgh, Vol. 34, No. 22. Retrieved July 25, 2005 from http://www.pitt.edu/utimes/issues/34/020711/07.html
Hatfield, H. (2004, November 23). Shopping spree, or addiction? In WebMD Health [On-Line serial]. Retrieved June 30, 2005 from http://my.webmd.com/content/Article/97/104241.htm?pagenumber=1
Hinkley, P. (2005). Stress cycle. Lecture notes.Jacobs, E. E., Masson, R. L., & Harvill, R. L. (2002). Group counseling: Strategies & skills (4th ed.). Pacific Grove, CA: Brooks/Cole.
Parker, R. (2003). Stanford researchers discover treatment for obsessive shopping disorder. In FuturePundit. Retrieved July 27, 2005 from http://www.futurepundit.com/archives/001490.html
Psychology Today. (1995). The call of the mall. In Yahoo Health. Retrieved July 15, 2005 from http://health.yahoo.com/health/centers/addiction/1361.html
Type of addiction – Shopping (n.d.). Retrieved July 27, 2005 from http://www.theway.uk.com/addoctopms/types/typesshop.htmAvl
What is shopping addiction and how can it be treated? (n.d.). Retrieved July 15, 2005 from http://www.coursework.info/i/263.html
Williams, G. (n.d.). Compulsive shopping addiction. In Way2Hope. Retrieved July 15, 2005 from http://www.way2hope.org/compulsive_shopping_addiction.htm
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